It’s tax time again. I don’t think there is a yearly event that I dislike more. This economic rut we seem to be stuck in is lasting longer than I think a lot of people were prepared for. As a real estate broker, I know how much real estate drives the economy and didn’t expect any kind of quick recovery, but I’ve had a hard time getting any kind of stability under my feet. I had bought a home that I wanted to move into 2 years after I bought it. I just wanted to get my son through high school first. I promised him “No big changes until you are graduated.” I figured I would move into that home and stay until my kids were a little older and more stable and possibly move my mom into it, because it was a one-story that could have accommodated her. Well, you know what they say about plans. Mine never happened. Mom wanted to stay close to church, friends, and doctors up north. I met Pete and married him. I tried to sell the home so I could be closer to mom as her need for caregiving increased, but finally had to rent it out to stop the economic bleed in my finances. Last year I had to admit to myself that it no longer made sense to be upside down in my finances every month paying mortgage, insurance, taxes, repairs, and homeowners association dues on a home whose rental income didn’t cover all of that. I was also doing the same with the condo I lived in with my son when I bought that house–all of this before I met Pete. After I married Pete, I was working as a broker and the work was getting harder and harder to come by and harder to do, so when I was offered a job with a start-up company with regular pay for consulting fees rather than straight commissions, it seemed like a great opportunity. Unfortunately, the company wasn’t making enough money to pay me more often than not, but I enjoyed the work and was learning a lot, and it seemed like our big break was just around the corner. That company shut down last year. My husband was getting contracts, but like most people he was accepting less in pay than he was used to, and his clients weren’t paying him on time. All of this is probably familiar territory for people reading this. This economy has affected everyone in one way or another. Long story short. I sold my house last year as a short sale. I also sold the condo as a short sale. For anyone who doesn’t know what that means, I sold those homes for less than I owed the bank. There have been a lot of programs to help people keep their homes, but none of them are any help for homes that you don’t occupy. Those are considered investment homes and none of the HAMP, HARP or “whatever” programs apply to them. Now it is tax time and I am holding my breath that I protected myself enough. You get 1099’s for the difference between what you sold the house for and what you owed the bank. This is not the case with your primary property that you occupy (in the state of CA), but it is the case with investment homes. It’s especially hard dealing with taxes when you are also dealing with hard economic circumstances. It’s especially hard when the rules keep changing and are hard to understand, and sometimes even the experts don’t know the answers. I had a lawyer helping me with the short sales, but that is no guarantee of anything. So I hold my breath. It is a bitter pill to swallow as the homes I just let go would have paid for me to live anywhere I want and have some kind of retirement–they were part of my retirement strategy. Like millions of Americans I now find myself caught short.
You may be asking yourself how I deal with all of this. You may have a hard time reading this, because it is too much like your own stresses. You may be asking yourself how you are going to get through your own circumstances. My mom taught me to deal with life and all of its’ vagaries. Yesterday, I was digging through files in order to put my tax information together and I found a note from mom. She wrote it on a beautiful card with a pen and ink drawing she did of Mt. Tamalpais in 1984. I read it and cried. Mom is still giving me what I need even after her death. If you are struggling, maybe you will find some comfort in her words:
July 9, 2007
Dear Daughter,
When things get too tough for me I have a standard mantra I repeat, “this too shall pass!” Whatever problems I may be facing today will eventually change–sorry, not always for the better, but they will change. Now, I’m learning to savor the moments of my life that are sweet. I have taken so much for granted over the years. For example, I use to love to walk out the door for my walk around the block–uphill, downhill, whatever. Now, I drive to a flat area to sort of toddle along to make sure I am exercised. I’m learning to pace myself to use the parts of the day when I feel best to accomplish something. Some days I feel good all day, some days I’m not so blessed. My point is, I’m trying my best to live life to the fullest, to be productive, useful and happy daily. Some days are easier than others, but that is life. I am especially blessed with loving children and grandchildren, good friends and a peaceful environment. I’ve wanted this kind of peace and contentment all of my life and have pushed to make it happen. I didn’t do it alone, however. God has been with me every step of the way. Even in my deepest sorrow, trouble, or pain I haven’t felt abandoned. I guess my faith in God and his unfailing love have been the moving factors in my life. I know with a certainty that God will be there guiding my steps even to the end of my life. Trust in God, He will never fail you.
Love,
Mom
Living Up to Mom 